Josh Hickman Hits the Big Time

Why Baseball is the most poorly run sport besides basketball and hockey

So I just drafted a fantasy baseball team. I've found that having a fantasy team is the only way to keep me interested in baseball, and baseball is all we have for a long, long, LONG time after the NCAA tournament ends (expect for the NBA playofss, but who watches that crap anymore?).

Anyway, I drafted a team that is sure to be the model for every fantasy team assembled afterward. Much like the NFL, fantasy baseball is a copycat league. I checked the schedule to see when I could start watching my gladiator-like players in action (some of whom I've actually heard of before), and it turns out Opening Day is Sunday April 1st. But only two games are being played that day, which means that for 26 teams Opening Day is the next day: the same day as the NCAA National Title game.

What?!?

Why on God's green earth would you schedule your opener to occur on the same day as another sport's final championship game? Is baseball so arrogant as to believe this won't drive away fans in, say, the Florida or Cleveland or Cincinnati or Los Angeles or Washington DC markets? Yes, baseball is that arrogant and has always been that arrogant. They canceled the World Series for a year, and the fans still came back. Hell, they called it the "World Series" before they even let black people play. I can see how the conversation must have went:

Bud Selig (commissioner): When are we going to start our season?
Robert Manfred (vp, labor relations): Why don't we just cancel it again? Don't we lose money every season anyway? And I fucking hate Donald Fehr.
Jonathan Mariner (vp, finance): We can't do that! We only say we're losing money, and our books show that almost every club is losing tons of money. But we're really richer than God! (extends his middle finger skyward) That's right bitch! What are you gonna do!
Selig: Settle down John. How about we start on April 1st. That's a nice, round date. And to whet the appetite of our retarded fans, we'll only play two games on that day and start the rest the next day. Christ, I'm a genius!
Bart Giamatti (vp, common sense): ....
Tim Brosnan (vp, punkin' fools): That's right Giamatti, you stay dead! We killed your ass long ago! We fucking KILLED YOUR ASS!!!
Selig: Well, since there are no objections, it's settled then. Now set that Royals fan on fire so I can light my cigar....

David Barrett demands his credit

The OG of the postgame

I hear 'ol Luther is taking credit for my brainchild. Well I'm simply not going to take this lying down even if Lute is. Oh I'm sorry, was that in poor taste? Check it out, to settle this once and for all I'm giving you the gift of the original version of "One Shining Moment". Where else can you get the drama, emotion and pure excitement that is the 1987 NCAA tournament? How else can you truly appreciate Derek Coleman, Steve Alford and Rick Pitino at the height of their powers? You can't. So turn up the volume, drop your pants around your ankles, grab some lube and let the moment wash over you.

Permission to buzz the tower!

With a tattoo like that, permission granted!

Big shout-out to our boy in Vancouver. Kicking ass, taking names, and covering those sexy shoulders with a tribute to Gordy and the Royal Canadian Air Force.

Chicago Bears Update - Go Strider's last post Part III

Adam Archuleta, bolsters Bears' secondary, all but securing another NFC championship, and clears all 3 chambers of the Bongest Yard on the same day. Lovie Smith declares love for Jesus, and Tank Johnson "stuffs the run", if you know what I mean.

Go Strider's last post - Part II - One Shining Moment

Why I Hate One Shining Moment

• While I love highlights, they never show the best ones in here
• Plenty of clips of fans, cheerleaders, bands, fat people, mascots, etc. -- I do not care about any of you!
• Lot's of highlights of players pointing, hugging, screaming, praying, crying, masturbating, smiling, saying "ahhhhh", babbling, kissing fingers, thumbs up, child hugging, mascot folatio, titty grabbing, etc. -- again, I do not care, at all. I just want to see badass shit
• The song is fucking terrible. It does absolutely ZERO justice to the moment. It's about as appropriate as rocking out to Nights in White Satin while beating your children (ask DIII about that)
• The song is sung by Luther Vandross - he sucks.
• The only people that like this song fall into one of 3 groups
• guys that cry
  
• people w/ zero taste in music
• my wife and her entire family - no offense wife and family
• kids whose parents haven't told them that it's not a good song
  
• It doesn't get me hyped, shouldn't it get me hyped?
  
• It reminds me of Pink doing gigs for the NFL, and that makes me mad
  

I don't know, I just can't remain silent but deadly about this stuff anymore.

Go Strider's final post - Part I

So, I just realized that my tag might make others think I'm a big Nick Cage fan. So, this will be Go Strider's final post. Prepare for the unveiling of a new name, an awesome, new name.

As the least informed college b-ball fan of the WUWS crew, I'd like to share my thoughts on the FL-OR game.

I do not share DIII's hatred of all things Pac-10 (outside the dawgs). My loyalties are linked to the $$$. What that means is, best I can tell, I am a huge Oregon fan, today. I love those ducks!!

This brings me to my next two points:

• According to my bracket, I know way more about men's hoops than any of these other degenerates. I've been Building a Mystery all over these chumps for the last week, and I expect that to continue with an Oregon victory, today. JPaulGeddy can eat it.
• can't remember what this was going to be, but Taylor just dunked all over someone in white. Who's playing again?

By the way, who loves bullet points? Me, I do . 80% of my job is sending emails with serious use of bullets that will never be read.

So, back to the game. 11-11, and Brewer called for the charge. Brooks with ill-advised shots, and my dog just sneezed all over my sister in-law. Nice!

What's with the fatty shooting hoops on that BOA commercial?

Do you know why, I think, people find Joakim is so ugly? Because he looks like a really ugly woman. That moustache - he looks like a 75 year-old Greek woman. Jeeze-louise!

Elephant In The Room? Porter's ear. What is that thing? Is against the rules to make fun of physical deformities of your opponents? Remind me to get the cauliflower chant going when the Huskies host the Ducks next year.

Leunen!!

22-19, Oregon. Florida just pulled down 13 offensive boards before finally drawing a foul. I'm no expert, but that kind of boxing out my end up biting the Ducks in the arse.

As for ideas for my new tag. I encourage our readers to submit ideas. Just to get this rolling, here some of my early ideas:

• Khan Heir
  
• A Dap Teyshaun
• The Meteorologist
• Major Guido's Lute
  
• Guarding Tess
  

Oregon looks like they have to work way harder for everything right now. I have a feeling this game is not going to end close.

Holy shit, did you see how that backspin totally fucked up that net. My God, these guys are good.

Are you on VOIP? What an asshole.

Do know what I want? I want to see Billy Donovan doing the splits. When is he going to make Time Cop II?

That shot didn't tickle the twine, it tortured the twine. That shot fucking water boarded that twine. Alberto Gonzalez wrote a memo explaining why the Geneva Conventions don't apply to that twine. That shot put a glass rod into the penis of that twine. Then the shot banged on that twine's penis with a rubber mallet, breaking the glass.

Shooter's bounce. Damn you Humphrey!

The King scares the shit out of me, for some reason.

Taurean Green is made out of people!!!!!!!

Oregon may, along with every other school, have hotter cheerleaders than UW. But UW's girls have a permanent lock on those military press records.

Don't you just love this time of year, cherry blossoms blossoming and shit?

Quick poll: Thoughts on One Shining Moment?

I hate the NCAA tournament

My bracket looks something like this

Tonight seems like a great time for a festivus airing of grievances. 9 months early you say? Suck my cack I respond.

1)Kansas
You dirty salt of the earth fuckers. I'm bad at basketball. Some would say I play at a DIII level. You know what I can do though? Make layups. Don't tell me that UCLA played tough defense in this game. I saw the stat early in the second half that showed Kansas was shooting 12/26 on layups and dunks. I now know what Ol' Dirty Bastard was talking about in the into to his first album.

2)Memphis
I'm not really sure why I'm pissed at you other than you cost me some possible money. At least Xavier and Tennessee made Ohio St sweat. You rolled over like dogs in the last five minutes.

3)Pac-10
I just HATE you other nine fuckers. The stupid WSU pride. The nouveau riche Oregon fans. Pretty much everything about UCLA. Fucking conquest (although the USC cheerleaders are top shelf). That damn Stanford tree. The rampant syphilis at Arizona St. Arizona for giving my bracket a bismarck in '97. Corvallis in general. Cal for...I don't really know but I hate Cal as well.

4)Anyone that's ahead of me on their backets
LICK MY BALLS!!! That salty taste is my bitterness spilling over. That includes half of the WUWS crew and about 400,000 people in ESPN nation.

5)Digger Phelps and Billy Packer
Because it's never a bad time to point out that you two are morons.

6)Joakim Noah
You earned this a long time ago. How will you annoy me tomorrow? Are you going to treat me to the Shooter McGavin? Perhaps you'll frighten Verne Lundquist again with your stupid ass dance. Perhaps you'll just look ugly. Doesn't matter, I'm gonna be pissed off when I see you on TV tomorrow.

I'm sure I missed somebody, but don't worry I hate you too. Enjoy the games tomorrow.

Elite Eight ramblings

Butler cannot kick it in the VIP room

It's the Elite Eight and I'm hyped. To kill off some of my nervous energy, I'm posting random thoughts here.

1. This is why I root for the big schools after the first weekend. Look at these matchups! Kansas/UCLA. Carolina/Georgetown. Ohio St/Memphis. Florida/Oregon. All of these games have the potential to be great. Somehow, Southern Illinois against UCLA just doesn't have the same ring to it.

2. How did my conference do? Guess what, I don't care. This is college basketball not football. I'd rather be Memphis (representing a bad conference and having a chance at the Final Four) than Washington (representing a good conference from my couch).

3. Why the fuck does my back hurt? This is like being a 40 year old. I wonder if a chiroparctic visit is covered by my insurance.

4. Jeff Green travelled. I'm not mad at the no call. My bracket was on life support before that shot.

5. Speaking of my bracket, you should cheer for Kansas and Memphis the rest of the way.

6. For me, the story of the tournament that hardly anyone is talking about is that Ohio St plays better when Greg Oden is on the bench. That team just seems to be more cohesive when he's not in there. Perhaps Mike Conley should be the Buckeye freshman declaring for the draft.

7. There are rumors that Rodney Stuckey is going to transfer from Eastern Washington to the Huskies. That would be awesome!

Alright, enjoy the games. Only the prettiest girls get to dance now.

Your yearly reminder. 16 to what?

When watching tonight's games, remember they are playing for a spot in the Elite Eight. Not the great eight. Not the final eight. The Elite Eight. With capital letters.

A google search for final eight comes up with the following.

That not basketball, that's a disaster.

Now for tonight's games, you should cheer for Kansas, Texas A&M, Pitt and Tennessee.

64 to 16: What I learned over the weekend

Psycho T will bite your face
While most of the WUWS crew is suffering from the cruel hangover that can only come from a 60 hour Vegas binge, I'm currently enjoying the sweet hangover that can only come from digesting 48 games in 4 days. Now it's time to take stock of the weekend and see if there was anything to be learned.

Who hit blackjack:
1)The SEC. A couple of weeks ago I dumped on the SEC but in terms of expected performance based on seeding, this conference did great. It's teams had the most wins vs expectations and placed the most teams in the Sweet 16 vs expectations.
2)Mid Majors. Hey the little guys are alright. Butler and Southern Illinois justified their high seedings. Their rewards are matchups against #1 seeds Florida and Kansas respectively. The party will be expected to end there but for now they get to grind on all the pretty girls in the room.
3)UNLV. Yeah, I bet against them but my policy is to never gamble with my heart. Wendell White has been a star and the Rebels have been surprisingly strong on the boards. This run brings back all the memories of Theus, Gilliam, Augmon and Johnson.
4)My bracket. I'm currently in 2nd but still have my entire Elite 8 alive and with Texas being eliminated, Go Strider's bracket will quickly fall from the top spot.

Who puked in the VIP lounge:
1)The ACC. Save for North Carolina, these guys had a bad weekend. Virginia and Maryland both failed to play up to their seeds. Duke got bloodied by Eric Maynor and VCU and Blue Devil fans must be sobered by the fact that Greg Paulus and Josh McRoberts each have two years of eligiblity left.
2)Wisconsin. Everyone could see this coming from a mile away. The Badgers were playing better a month ago and the loss of Brian Butch while not a killer certainly didn't help. A shame as this team's only crime is that it's a little bit boring.
3)Washington teams not nicknamed the Huskies. At least we have the good sense to stay home when we get fucked up. WSU and Gonzaga both lost bringing much joy to the DIII palace.

Who didn't win their 4 team parlay but also didn't fuck a tranny:
1)The Pac-10. They got three teams into the Sweet 16 but UCLA and Oregon were expected to be there while USC isn't exactly Cinderella as a #5 seed. WSU lost a tough one to Vandy but Arizona and Stanford were less than inspiring. This weekend will be the real test for this conference that bitches and moans about east coast bias.
2)The Big-10 in general and Ohio St in particular. ESPN will have you believe that they shit all over themselves. In reality, of their six teams only Wisconsin and Ohio St were actually expected to make the Sweet 16. Ohio State partied like a rockstar on Thursday then nearly choked on their vomit come Saturday. Hey survive and advance. Sometimes what works in Vegas works in the tourney as well.
3)Kevin Durant. He averaged nearly 30 points a game but his Longhorns got throttled by USC. Hopefully this wasn't his last game at Texas but wishing for that is stupid.
4)The #1 seeds. We saw Florida, Carolina and Ohio St all struggle this weekend. Kansas on the other hand cruised and is playing very well right now. All of them won which sets up some potentially huge matchups next weekend.

Well that's a wrap for the first weekend of the tournament. The lack of any huge Cinderellas means that there are going to be some big games this weekend. While the first weekend of the tourney is the most exciting, for my money the Sweet 16 and Elite 8 is the best weekend for fans of college basketball. Move over Albany. Step aside VCU. It's time to make room for the blue bloods.

George petitions to get some reps at the combine

Step 1: Commission Dean Kamen to design a state-of-the -art helmut that he can fit that Admiral Akbar like noggin in.

Step 2: Throw the ball 70 yards. Repeat.

Step 3: Go into hibernation until Raiders lose first 5 games of '07.

Like a 10-yr old on Christmas Eve...

I can't handle the night before the NCAA tourney.... I've watched every ESPN analyst breakdown every game. I have the betting lines memorized like pi (3.1415, something, something). I got writers cramp from filling out so many brackets. The Tivo has been cleared for space, the Slingbox is all wired up, the Vitamin R (Rainier beer) is getting cold in the fridge.

Let's just play the games all ready... 10 hours and counting.

Yay!!!

R.I.P. Stardust

Alas, Vegas will never be the same. The Stardust Casino is gone. The venerable casino at the north end of the strip, home to many years of debauchery and booze-addled shenanigans, was imploded yesterday to make room for a casino that is newer, shinier, and undoubtedly has the good sense to never allow me or my friends through the door.




But how I will miss the Stardust.
Gimme another sports book where...
You can still find a seat at the bar at 2:00 pm when you finally roll out of bed.
There's a McDonald's strategically placed halfway between it and your hotel.
You can choose the no-brainer option of drinking out of a souvenir beer mug all day.
You can walk next door and get a $1 margarita, and a $1 18-inch hot dog (not recommended).
You can (and should) sing at the top of your lungs with the lounge cover band.

Stardust was the best of a bygone era and now all that remains of it is my souvenir beer mug. R.I.P.

Gustavus Adolphus wins Second Title !!!

Gustavus Adolphus wins Second Title defeating conference rival St.Mary's in the coveted All-MIAC National Title Game. All eyes were on the battle between centers Glazier and Valentine, but in the end it was Larry Dorsey who took control of the game and taking MVP honors. The title gives coach Geddy his coveted second championship and denys his arch-rival sergeantsuj his first. These season was the last of the mighty Miac teams as both coaches move up to DI to carry on...

GO VALPO BABY!

Time Capsule

I will forever remember this evening as the night that Jerramy hitted on (slurred at) my future wife, immediately prior to this incident. Ah, memories...

Unsigned Seahawks TE Stevens arrested

Jerramy Stevens was arrested early this morning in Arizona and faces charges of driving while intoxicated and possession of marijuana, according to the Arizona Republic.
Stevens was taken into custody at approximately 2:30 a.m., according to the paper, after he admitted to drinking four or five margaritas. He was cited for possession of marijuana, which was found in his back pocket, and taken into custody by the Scottsdale Police, the Republic reported.

Is it me, or do all these teams suck?

Like everyone worth a damn, I've been spending the last couple days filling out brackets trying to come up with The Perfect Bracket. My personal bracket-filling process is long, intense, and in-depth, with much time spent pouring over matchups, performing statistical analysis, and breaking down everything from where teams are playing to how hot they are. It's an annual rite for me. Maybe the best word that describes it is "futile", because it is long since I was even remotely competitive in any bracket-filling competition I have entered. I think I peaked in about 4th grade, when I picked teams based on the coolness of their names.

Anyway, while immersed in my annual ritual this year I came to one inescapable conclusion and irrefutable truth: almost all the teams in the tourney suck this year. Seriously, name one team seeded 3 or lower, besides Texas, that has a shot to win? Or even make the Final Four? Let's break it down:

3 seeds: Oregon, Pittsburgh, Washington State, Texas A&M.
The simple fact is none of these teams will make the Final Four because they'd have to go through a 1 or 2 seed (or both) to do it. Oregon has the best shot, but Aaron Brooks is a punk and he'll fold like a chair against tough defense like Wisconsin's. Pittsburgh is overrated and can't get past UCLA. Washington State is a nice story but they peaked in January. Texas A&M is just not very good.

4 seeds (minus Texas): Maryland, Southern Illinois, Virginia.
Maryland peaked too early, as did Virginia, and everyone know that mid-majors like So. Ill. make better runs when they are underdogs rather than when they are favored.

Everyone else: fugedaboutit.

Even some of the 2 seeds are weak, like Wisconsin and Memphis. And Georgetown is getting so much Final Four buzz that there's no way they make a run. Jay Bilas sealed Georgetown's fate by picking them to win it all.

That leaves: Florida, North Carolina, Kansas, UCLA, and Ohio State. Parity be damned; this will be the first year in a long time were chalk rules and the Final Four will consist of 3 or 4 number 1 seeds. These teams are just too good to be upset.

On another note, if you age me by about 130 years and slide me into Digger Phelps' chair, no one would know the difference.

WOW, UW Snubbed by NIT

This is just sad.

19-13 Huskies unexpectedly subbed by NIT

The National Invitational Tournament announced the its 32 teams this evening, and the 19-13 Washington men's basketball team was not in the field.
More to come later.

Selection Show Commentary

It's time for the 1st annual NCAA selection show diary. I tried getting in touch with SeargentSuj but he's nowhere to be found. No matter, I have my UNLV hoodie and a bowl of chips and guac and I'm ready to roll.

2:39 Kansas just finished off Texas in overtime. That should wrap up a #1 seed for them. I'll probably pick them to make the final four but they've burned me many many times in the past.

2:43 Seth Davis just made his first stupid comment of the afternoon talking about the 19 year old NBA rule. Now Clark Kellog is yelling and Greg Gumbel appears to be scared.

2:45 Joe Lunardi just gave us his last 4 teams in. I don't care, none of them will do much. Why are we spending so much time talking about Old Dominion? Will any of us remember Old Dominion by next Saturday?

2:49 Hey Nick Fazekas is coached by Jimmy Kimmel!

2:50 John Calipari just called his team great. Really? They don't do much well besides jump. Did he just call Seth Davis a nazi sympathizer?

3:00 Alright here we go. Who are the #1 seeds? I say Kansas, UCLA, UNC and Florida. Wait I'm forgetting someone. Probably Ohio St. And the real #1s are Florida, UNC, Ohio St, and Kansas. That makes sense. Looks like UCLA really blew it when they shit the bed on Thursday.

3:04 Here's Jim and Billy. Prepare to be annoyed. Jim tells me that Florida is the story of the tournament. How about we let the game be played before deciding that. I'm sure he already has a corny line ready for when they win it all. I now give you a couple classic Nantz lines:

"And Cleaves has restored the Magic in East Lansing"
"It started in March, ended in April and belonged to May"

Ugghhh

3:09 Ok the Midwest
1.Florida 2.Wisconsin 3.Oregon 4.Maryland

Hey Old Dominion got the #12 seed against Butler. Perhaps we will care about ODU for at least a couple of days. Sarge's Maryland team got the #4 seed. Not too bad but I'm not that high on them. UNLV gets a #7 against Georgia Tech. Ouch, I don't like that matchup. This bracket looks like a cakewalk if Florida decides to show up. Otherwise, who else is out there? Maybe Oregon? ehhh. I like them better than Wisconsin though.

3:17 Here's the West
1.Kansas 2.UCLA 3.Pitt 4.Southern Illinois

The Kentucky/Villanova winner looks like fodder for Kansas. I don't see Kansas losing on the first weekend. UCLA stayed out west, perhpas that will be an advantage for them. Wow, Duke as a #6 seed. I don't think I've ever seen them seeded so low. Gonzaga and Indiana will have a rematch from one of the worst games from last year. If the zags win, they could have another rematch with UCLA. Who'll cry this year? Derek Ravio? I'd like that. If Kansas does lose early this region looks wide open. Could Pitt's big guys expose UCLA? They might have a shot at winning this region.

3:23 And now with the East
1.UNC 2.Georgetown 3.Washington St. 4.Texas

The Marquette/Mich St winner could give Carolina a tough game. USC got a 5? That seems high but they're a solid team. Texas at #4 across from UNC could be a great Sweet 16 game. Christ this is a tough region. Seth Davis just called Oral Roberts to beat Wash St. I think they lose to Vanderbilt but if they coug it in the first round the boys of WUWS will be all the happier. Wow, I'm not sure UNC can get out of this bracket? I think there might be some upsets on the bottom half of the bracket leaving Georgetown to cruise to the Elite 8. Perhaps Georgetown/Texas for a chance at the final 4?

3:33 Finally the South
1.Ohio St 2.Memphis 3.Texas A&M 4.Virginia

I don't love Ohio St. but who's gonna beat them in their half of the bracket? Can the Nevada/Creighton winner beat Memphis? Ohh Texas A&M at 3, I like them. Ohhhh Louisville at #6, I like them too. I'm not too high on Ohio St so I'm gonna say either Louisville or Texas A&M comes out of the bottom half to beat the Buckeyes.

Ok they're done with the bracket. Looks like the ACC got 7 bids, no surprise there. The Pac-10 got 6 seeds. Nice job, too bad the Dawgs weren't one of them. NIT baby!

The mid majors didn't get a ton of bids. I don't care one bit. You know what I hate? Cinderellas. Waaaaaay overrated. It makes for boring games the second weekend. I want to see games like UNC/Texas, Kansas/UCLA or Texas A&M/Memphis. I don't want to see Creighton even though Nate Funke has a cool name.

Everyone is crying about Syracuse not making it. Why do all talking heads love Jim Boeheim so much? What does he do behind the scenes to always get so much love? I thought they sucked this year so I'm not upset that they're out.

Billy Packer just said that he's seen Winthrop a lot of times this year. Fucking liar.

3:47 Time to grill the committee chair. This is usually great. Billy and Jim make retarded points while some sacrificial lamb sits there like a deer in headlights. He's telling us the Kansas would have gotten the #1 seed regardless if they lost today. He's telling us how hard his job was. Shit, I'd gladly sit around and pick basketball teams to be in a tournament then go to dinner. That sounds like fun. Billy is congratulating the guy? What happened there? That was a real disappointment.

Ok, the brackets are set. Later this week, we'll have our draft and bracket pick ems. If we're lucky we'll get some field reports from the Mandalay sports book. Enjoy the tournament.

Another Sure-fire Bust

Even though he cries and plays soft, this is why Josh Mcroberts will get drafted in the lottery.

NBA Draft Preview: Who Will Be A Bust?

Now is the time to do an NBA Draft preview, before someone gets hot for the NCAA tournament and artificially inflates their stock (Bryant Reeves, I'm looking in your direction. It's hard not to, I know....). The consensus seems to be that this is the deepest draft in years. Really? In reality, it's significantly worse than the 2003 draft even before we learn that a few of the top projected picks will stay in college. Below are several highly-rated prospects, ranked in order of possible draft position, evaluated based on what they have done and what the odds they have of reaching their "tremendous upside potential".

1. Greg Oden
It's hard to judge a man who is hurt so badly he shoots free throws with his off-hand, but he has shown that he can be taken out of games by physical opponents. Fightling for position and showing passion have nothing to do with his injured hand. His physical gifts assure him of a certain level of success in the NBA, barring injury, and he can be a dominant defender. But are is gifts significantly greater than Michael Olowokandi's? He will be an above-average NBA center, think Tyson Chandler with a few more dunks, but not an all-timer. In today's NBA, that makes him a #1 pick.

2. Kevin Durant
What can't he do? Offensively, you have to look a ways backward for a good comparison. Many people mention Carmelo Anthony, but Durant far surpases Anthony's skills at the same age. Anthony wasn't a top-5 pick until everyone saw his play in the NCAAs. What sets him apart is his rebounding abilities, which Anthony never had. He's more like a Glenn Robinson, who was POY and led Purdue to a #1 seed (and historic flameout), although Durant has more athleticism and that alone will make him a better pro than the Big Dog. Here's the real #1 pick.

3. Julian Wright
Wright is often called "versatile" and "unselfish", which are kisses of death for an NBA career. Scouts also often add "when he wants to" before describing his potential, which is another big red flag. Wright can be a very nice role player, maybe even a third fiddle on a good team, but he will need a defined roll and he is not an alpha dog. His demeanor on the court suggests he would flourish in such a role. Is that what you want out of a #3 pick? Since the owner of the #3 pick is usually a bad team then adding Wright won't help, much like the then-horrible Grizzlies selecting Shane Battier. Julian will have a solid NBA career, but not with the team who drafts him.

4. Brandan Wright
All potential, no delivery. Scouts love his size, length, athleticism, etc: all the measurables. But watch him on the court and you get the feeling he should be doing more. He can't shoot free throws, which is usually an indicator of how much a players works on his game, and he plays next to Tyler Hansbrough who does all the dirty work. Wright is a classic example of potential-driven hype.

5. Joakim Noah
Noah plays with more passion for a high-lottery pick than anyone in a long time. But how good will he be? Well, he doesn't appear to be improved from last season. And he's called the NBA "a joke". So we have a strange dichotomy: he plays with all the passion and fervor anyone could ask for, but off the court he doesn't seem to have the same fire to improve. In addition, he's another player who gained a reputation based largely on a hot streak: the 2006 NCAAs. I don't trust his commitment to basketball, particularly NBA basketball which he has called "a joke". He could be Marcus Camby if he lands on the right team, but only if he lands ont he right team. Most likely he'll get drafted by a bad team, get poisoned by the NBA atmosphere, and fade away with unfulfilled potential.

6. Al Horford
Horford might be a better pro than his teammate Noah. The NBA is moving to smaller, faster teams and Horford could be a force. He's Udonis Haslem with a bit more talent and shot-blocking ability, and like Haslem he could flourish in the right system. With a strong motor and a will to improve, he'll be in the league long enough to find that system.

7. Spencer Hawes
This is another guy who will stick around in the league for a long time, and eventually find the right situation to flourish. He's as skilled as any center in the last twenty years, but he clearly needs more strength and weight. Once he becomes an NBA-ready rebounder, which is probably 2-3 years of physical development away, he can be the centerpiece of a beautiful motion offense on a team with a few shooters, a slasher, and a rugged rebounder/defender. His work ethic is unquestionable (people aren't born with the ability to finish moves with both hands like he can), so it's only a matter of time before he becomes an effective NBA center, barring injury. Until then, however, he's a poor man's Andrew Bogut.

8. Yi Jianlian
"The best Chinese center since Yao Ming". There are other Chinese centers since Yao Ming? He's supposedly a shooter/ballhandler 7-footer who's dominating Chinese basketball. China has a billion people, and the only one who plays in the NBA is 7'6". Not good odds. This reeks of a desperate attempt to find "the next Yao". This is a guaranteed wasted pick, so he'll likely go to the Oklahoma City Sonics.

9. Brook Lopez
Another big man with potential, and most likely P.J. Brown at best. With so many big guys in the lottery, that means some really excellent players will be taken by some pretty good teams in the mid-to-late teens. Does that make this a deep draft? No, it makes it a deceptively shallow draft with a bunch of possible stiffs at the top. It's guaranteed that at least 5 of the top 10 taken in this draft will be disappointments at best. Lopez is a strong candidate.

10. Thaddeus Young
Now we start to get into the glut of swingmen who would be #5 picks in normal years but this year will get pushed because of all the big man "talent". Young's negatives are strength and the lack of a position. "Lack of a position" is a term that idiots use to inadvertently reveal their incompetence. What position does Dwayne Wade play? What position does Dirk Nowitzki play? Young has as much potential as Julian Wright in the right system.

11. Chase Budinger
Talented... Athletic... Great shooter... Not to be dismissive, but haven't we heard this before from players out of Arizona? Well, we have. But that's not a bad thing because Zona alumni are all over the NBA. Budinger can be an impact player in the NBA as it moves back to a faster pace with his shooting ability and size. By "impact" I mean that he'll be the x-factor in some games, but won't be able to overcome too much attention by the opposition. In other words, a strong role player for a good team but a sub-third fiddle. Like Kyle Korver.

12. Al Thornton
An athletic defender with improving offensive skills. Can anyone peg him for sure? No, but he'll almost certainly end up better than....

13. Corey Brewer
Classic. Inflated stock due to a hot streak on a good team in March, followed by an "inconsistent" season. The reason? He was never very good to begin with. I think he has a birthmark on his ass that resembles the word "bust".

There you go, I got you through the lottery. This is the time of year when everyone can be an NBA superstar, and no one will be a bust. History shows us otherwise. The key is figure out who will be the bust before drafting him (>cough<>cough<). Ahem, excuse me. Anyway, watch out for the player not on anyone's list who rises based solely on being hot during the next couple weeks. That guy is going to be a bust, too.

consolation....

Coug'in It!

What does it really mean to "Coug It"!

Check for yourself, but my definition is a huge loss to the DAWGS in the PAC 10 Tourney!!

Cougars Blow!

The next George Mason?

Pundits across the land have scoured the college basketball landscape looking for the next George Mason. The bracket buster. The Cinderella. The team we'll all be talking about this March around the water cooler.

WUWS is here to tell you to stop the search. We've found them.

They've got everything we look for in a Cinderella. They've got great guard play. They have a team laden with upperclassmen. They have a coach who has been there before. This year's Cinderella team is Florida. Yes, Florida. Florida will make a dramatic run through the tournament and stun the masses.

No, you say. They lost three games in a row just last week. No team has won two years in a row in 15 years. You may even argue that their star player is just too ugly for CBS to allow it to win 6 games in a row. But you would be wrong.

Florida has, like, 9 players that are sure-fire first-round draft picks as soon as they deign to declare for the draft. At least three of the players have fathers that were African tennis stars. Over the last year, that has a ridiculously strong correlation with NCAA postseason success.

So after looking at the evidence, it is clear Florida will be this year's Cinderella team. But how far will their run go? A championship? Or will their run be stopped by prohibitive favorite Winthrop? Only time will tell....

Mancini Goal Champions League Roma vs Lyon

If you all missed Sportscenter Top 10 last night, do yourself a favor and YouTube #2. Mancini from Roma does like 5 step-overs in a row to burn the defender, then scores. Super dope!

We must protect this house...

...or some shit like that. These uniforms are ugly. Under Armour better be paying these schools enough money to buy Reggie Bush's family a bigger house to justify these abominations.

Odd?......

Duckett to visit Seahawks

The Seahawks have scheduled a visit from T.J. Duckett, a running back from Washington. Duckett is expected to arrive later this week.
He is an unrestricted free agent who has been in the league five years. He was a first-round pick by Atlanta in 2002 and traded to Washington before last season and carried 38 times for 132 yards in 2006.

Maybe some O-line help? Possibly a little depth in the secondary? Or how about a 5th or 6th running back, that sounds nice...

WUWS NCAA Tournament Preview Capsule: Georgia Tech

Team: Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets

Conference: Atlantic Coast Conference

Current Record: 20-10, (8-8)

Notable Wins: at Memphis, Duke, UConn, North Carolina, Boston College

Times I've seen them on TV: enough

Tournament Resume:

Georgia Tech is a young team coming together at the right time. With convincing victories over Boston College and North Carolina in it's last two games, Paul Hewitt's Yellow Jackets have solidified their position in the tournament (barring a collapse in the first round of the ACC tournament) and have shown themselves to be a team that can play with anyone on a given night.

Tech's up-and-down season started with a bang, with 5 straight victories, including Purdue at home and Memphis on the road. What followed was typical of a talented young team. The Yellow Jackets, who's top two scorers are freshmen, struggled on the road while looking like a top 25 team at home. Adding to the inconsistency during this stretch was the loss of Lewis Clinch due to suspension for violating school rules. I assume they're talking about those school rules against serial rape or murder, because otherwise I can't see suspending your teams leading scorer over the first ten games. Especially when a guy named Mouhammad Faye (affectionately nicknamed Al Gay-da by his teammates) is tagged to replace him.

Still, over the course of the season Hewitt got his team to gel together and got some big performances off the bench from guys like Anthony Morrow and Mario West. Winning 7 of their last nine games has likely put Georgia Tech back into the NCAA tournament and has the Yellow Jackets looking like a dark horse contender for the Final Four.

Outlook:

So, why are these Yellow Jackets so dangerous in the tournament. Two names.

Javaris and Thadeus.

If those names make you think of ancient Greek warriors, you're on the right track. Neither of these guys will hesitate to impale you with a javelin, then drag your bleeding corpse around campus behind a chariot.

Javaris Crittenton has the size and athletic ability that teams drool over at the point guard position. He has great point guard instincts and a natural ability to get the ball into the paint and get fouled. Early in the season he had a tendency to get a little flashy and committed some turnovers, but his game has settled down of late and he's turned into a real court leader.

Thaddeus Young was one of the most highly regarded freshmen coming into this season and for the most part has lived up to expectations. He's a natural small forward with exceptional athleticism that makes him great at attacking the basket, pressure defense and offensive rebounding. He also has great hands and a sweet touch around the basket. His outside shooting can be a little inconsistant, but his decision making has omproved over the course of the season and he's shown a high level of basketball IQ. Only his ball handling is really lacking at this point in his development.

Prediction:

Final Four

Soccer Transvestism linked to Suicide and Awesome Movies

Recent study shows a 100% correlation between kid actors that play tranny soccer players and suicide. Rodney Dangerfield is also dead.

8 days till Selection Sunday

I told you, Julian Wright is not afraid of Kevin Durant.

Kansas gives me a hard on, I'm not ashamed to admit it.

WUWS NCAA Tournament Preview Capsule: Washington

Team: Washington
Conference: Pac-10
Current Record: 17-12 (7-10)
Notable Wins: Nichols State, Northern Iowa, Eastern Washington
What stands in their way: The Pac-10 Tourney
How you ask? By winning the Pac-10 Tourney of course.
How you ask? No idea, but this team is chalk full of talent, and who knows, all you need is three wins right?

Besides, if someone on this blog figures the Hoyas can win a national championship, well we all know that the Dawgs have just as good of shot. (except the big east blows)

WUWS NCAA Tournament Preview Capsule: Georgetown

Team: Georgetown

Conference: Big East

Current Record: 23-7 (9-6)

Notable Wins: More mediocre Big East teams than I care to count

While the other "contributors" to this blog write fluff pieces about their homoerotic mascot fantasies, I'm going to give you analysis that you can take straight to the bank, or a sports book, or straight to hell for all I care.

Georgetown is going to win the national championship.

Senior leadership - check

Good guard play - check

An oversized stiff in the middle- check

Yeah, they've got it all, but thats not why they're going to win it. The last 22 national champions have all shot over 40% from the field for the season. The Hoyas are destroying that mark, shooting 51.2% - 3rd best in the nation! That's higher than Josh Heytvelt on a Friday night. And that's why they're going to win the national championship.

So unless you think 22 years of history is complete hogwash, count on the Hoyas to win the whole thing. And while you're at it, you might want to check out Texas A&M too. No, not that Texas A&M, the one from Corpus Christi. That powerhouse from the South shoots even better than Georgetown!

Alaskan High School Students Exploit Loophole, Fast-Track Path To Heaven

Bong Hits 4 Jesus!!!

NCAA Tourney Ratings Expected To Drop

Indeed...

WUWS NCAA Tournament Preview Capsule: Virginia

Team: Virginia Cavaliers
Conference: Atlantic Coast Conference
Current Record: 20-9 (10-5)
Notable Wins: Arizona, Duke, @Maryland
Times I've seen them on TV: 0

Lets make this simple. Virginia is leading the ACC. The ACC has both Duke and North Carolina among it's illustrious members. What does this mean? It means the Virginia Cavaliers are the best team in the nation.

Can I name a single player on their team? No. Are two of the other top four teams in the ACC Boston College and Virginia Tech? Yes. Can I name a player on either one of those teams? No. Does the "Cavalier" mascot elicit homo-erotic fantasies in my imagination? Certainly.

But that's just a list of random questions and tells you nothing about what this Virgina team is like. I assume, since I know nothing about this team, that it is a gritty group who play well together because of relentless work ethic and strong senior leadership. They probably play smart, too, and don't turn the ball over. Maybe they have somebody who shoots three pointers really well. I don't know.

But this is all just fluff. I know all you gamblers out there are waiting for my prediction for filling out your brackets, so here goes:

The Virginia Cavaliers will not win the NCAA Championship.

WUWS NCAA Tournament Preview Capsule: Maryland

Team: Maryland Terrapins
Conference: Atliantic Coast Conference
Current Record: 23-7, (9-6)
Notable Wins: North Carolina, Duke, @Duke, n-Michigan State
Times I've seen them on TV: 0

Maryland beat Duke! Twice! Once at home and once at Duke! Gary Williams has done yet another masterful job. He recruits good people as well as good players, so it's no surprise that no one from Maryland has hired someone to kill a teammate.

I was watching ESPN and I saw a guy named Nichols who is their best player, but I can't say I caught his first name. Sal Nichols? Anyway, he's pretty awesome. He can handle the ball, pass, stand in front of people on defense, and he's very long. I project him as the #15 draft pick to New Jersey. I checked on how bad he tore up Duke, but it turns out there is no 'Nichols' on Maryland's roster. Whatever.

Maryland is hot after a 3-6 conference start. And we all know what happens when a Terrapin gets rolling downhill. That's right, national championship. You heard it here first, Sal Nichols will lead Maryland to an NCAA title!

WUWS NCAA Tournament Preview Capsule

Today kicks off the annual WUWS team preview capsules. They may be filled with errors, rumors and innuendo but it sure beats hearing the same shit from Digger Phelps. Today, I'll look at one of my all time favorite teams the UNLV Runnin' Rebels.

Team: UNLV Runnin' Rebels

Conference: Mountain West

Current Record: 24-6 (11-4)

Notable Wins: at Nevada, at Texas Tech, BYU, Air Force

Times I've seen them on TV: 0 (The MWC has managed to have a worse TV contract than the Pac-10 so none of their games are ever shown)

This is the most wins UNLV has had since JR Rider was terrorizing the strip. They were picked to finish with 18 or so wins and yet another trip to the NIT. Somehow, they have played above their heads and in the process saved coach Lon Kruger's job. Speaking of Kruger, his son Kevin transferred from Arizona St. becuase he knew they were going to be terrible. That's the kind of heady thinking that has allowed the coach's son to be a leader on this team. The other stars are JoVan "Wink" Adams and Wendell White. They form an especially badass backcourt in the Rebels' 3 guard lineup. The flip side is that UNLV's lack of height could be exposed by bigger teams.

Most bracket projections currently have the Rebels around a 6 seed. This means they will be matched up with a mediocre team like Illinois or Creighton that is equally capable of beating UNLV or rolling over and playing dead. I see them winning their first round game prompting Verne Lundquist to comment that "you need guards to win in March." UNLV's season will come to a crashing halt in the second round when they play a team like Georgetown or Pittsburgh. They will get killed on the boards prompting Lundquist to comment that "it's such an advantage to have big men."

This just in...

Kevin Durant is good. I can't remember the last time a player inspired so many man crushes. Even Tim Hardaway gets a funny feeling in his stomach when he watches the Texas freshman play. Last night I watched Texas vs. Texas A&M live from the DIII palace. In what was probably the second best game of the season so far, Durant had 30 and 16 as Texas won in double OT. Does anyone else feel like this is the ultimate high risk/high reward team come tourney time? I can see them going anywhere from round 2 all the way to the title game.

Conclusions:
Kevin Durant is awesome.
Texas will be interesting to watch in the tourney.
Julian Wright in unconcerned with any of this.